Long-distance dating at Christmas and New Year: travelling, video calls and meeting safely

01To travel or to stay: how to decide

Before buying a ticket or accepting an invitation, it is worth talking clearly. The holidays raise emotional pressure and can, without meaning to, turn a trip into a test of “how much do you love me.”

• Talk about expectations. Is it a trip to get to know each other, to spend the holidays together, to meet the family? Each of you may want something different, and it is fine to say so.
• Neither should feel obliged. Nobody has to travel or host someone to prove interest; a “not yet” is a valid answer.
• Consider the real logistics. Work dates, family, budget, weather, paperwork and travel times.
• Think of a plan B. If something changes, what will you do? Are cancellations possible? Can you meet on another date?

If it is your first time meeting in person, a short, light visit before the holidays or in January, with less traffic and less pressure, may suit you better. For an overview of travelling to meet someone, see our guide to travelling to Mexico to meet someone and the one on long-distance relationships.

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A holiday trip is a plan for two, not a favor or a test of affection.

02When and how to book in December

During the holidays flights, hotels and buses fill up and prices rise. Booking early helps, and choosing your dates well helps more.

• Avoid peak days. Normally 23 to 26 December and 30 December to 2 January see the highest demand at airports and terminals (confirm with airlines and official sources). If you can, travel a few days before or after.
• Book flexible cancellation when you can. A change of plans over the holidays is more likely than it seems.
• Allow margin. At airports and on the roads, traffic and queues are heavier; schedule connections with time to spare and avoid landing very late in a city you do not know.
• Check entry requirements. A valid passport, immigration form and customs rules change: confirm them with official sources such as Mexico's Instituto Nacional de Migración and your own government's site.
• Read your country's travel advisory. For example, the US State Department publishes advisories by state at travel.state.gov; some areas have restrictions, so check them before choosing a destination.

If you prefer a beach or mountain destination for the holidays, see our guide to Christmas away from home and the December calendar. Confirm schedules, prices and conditions with each airline, hotel or bus line.

03Video-call dates with charm

If you cannot meet, video calls can be more than a conversation: with a small ritual they feel like a date. They are also a good way to confirm that the person is who they say they are before any trip.

• A Nochebuena toast. Agree on a time, each with your own drink and dinner, and toast across the distance. Remember the time changes between countries; confirm each person's time zone (Mexico abolished daylight saving time in most of the country in 2022, but some border areas keep it; confirm).
• Dinner side by side. Each prepares something seasonal (ponche, tamales, a dessert) and you eat “together” on screen.
• A shared playlist. Choose posada or New Year music and build a shared list.
• A New Year countdown. Coordinate each person's local time and toast at each midnight.
• Games and activities. An online board game, a virtual museum tour or watching the same film at the same time.

Protect your privacy: do not share your address, documents or bank details on a video call, avoid recording or screenshotting without permission and be wary if someone always refuses to connect or show their face live.

04Safety before meeting in person

A holiday visit is exciting, and that is exactly why it pays to keep safety habits. Seasonal scams take advantage of enthusiasm; also review our guide to seasonal scams.

• Meet on video first. Several calls, with camera, on different days, and talk about details of their life that can be checked.
• Send no money before meeting. Not for tickets, visas, documents, hospital bills or “emergencies.” If someone asks, stop: review our guide to deposit scams.
• Stay in your own accommodation. Book your own verifiable hotel or lodging; do not stay at the home of someone you have just met.
• First meeting in a public place, in daylight. A coffee, a museum or a busy restaurant; keep your own transport.
• Share your itinerary. Send the hotel address, flight details and plans to someone you trust, and agree on times to check in.
• Watch your drink and your plans. Drink what you choose, do not leave your glass unattended and do not agree to change venue if it makes you uncomfortable.
• Trust your instincts. If something changes (another address, another person, pressure to stay over or for money), cancel and ask for help.

For more detail, see our guide to trust and safety and the one on safe online dating.

05Visiting and meeting the family: what to expect

If the trip coincides with the holidays, you may be invited to a posada or Nochebuena. It is not obligatory, and it can be a lot for a first visit.

• Ask what it means. See our guide to invitations to Nochebuena or a posada.
• Respect family time. On the 24th and 25th it is normal for the other person to spend time with their own people, and it is fine to leave space.
• Propose your own plan. A dinner in a public place on the 23rd, 26th or 27th gives you a date without interfering with the family schedule.
• Bring a simple token. Sweets, coffee or something from where you live is appreciated; avoid expensive gifts. See our guide to Christmas gifts when you are dating someone.

And remember that communication is slower in these days; our guide to slow replies at Christmas can help you avoid worrying.

06Realistic expectations for after the holidays

The holidays condense emotions. It is normal to feel elated during the visit and empty on coming home. Some tips:

• Talk about what comes next, without pressure. How often will you talk? Are there plans to meet again? A simple conversation is better than big promises.
• Do not make big changes in the heat of the moment. Moves, jobs or major commitments deserve time and calm, not the excitement of a week.
• Look after your everyday life. Keep your friendships, your work and your routines; a healthy relationship adds to your life, it does not replace it.
• It is fine if there is no chemistry. A trip can show there is no connection. Saying so respectfully is a form of care.

If you live alone and would like to meet someone discreetly at this time of year, Premium Dating Mexico is a private introductions service mediated by the administrator: it is free for women, nobody pays for a meeting, identities are verified and photos are protected. Learn more on the home page.

Travel requirements, peak dates and customs change every year: always confirm with official sources and with the other person.